First Written: 26-Jan-2023 | Thu 14:44

Stop traveling to vacation resorts!

Stop it!

What’re you doing?

Why are you going to another country just to get lost in a subsection of America?? Everyone speaks English anyways. You can buy your margarita mix at Walgreens!

What’s even the point of resorts anyways? What new experience are you getting?

If you want a watering hole for people who like to party and get drunk for a few days – Fuck it, go to a resort.

But don’t lie to yourself and say you’re going to a ‘foreign country’. Nah nah nah nah. You’re just going to a centralized place that everyone from foreign countries (let’s be honest, usually Americans) all agree to get drunk at.

Is it really any different from a glorified bar? What new experiences are you actually getting? What new people are you meeting? Some other romanticizers escaping from the daily grind?

Do you really think you’ll meet someone that would change your life at a resort? (Not even romantically, but hey, maybe)

The whole thing is just one giant lie!

“Let’s go to a resort! It’ll be fun!”

I get it. Vacation. A break from the daily grind. But are we really gaining anything? Will it really alter the course of our lives or is it just a temporary band-aid on the constant stress of our daily grind? Does it really solve the problem or is it just an escape?

Damn Colin, chill out

Alright alright. They’re not all bad. And there’s nothing wrong with a temporary escape… as long as that’s how you view it.

But let’s not lie to ourselves. It’s not a ‘unique opportunity’. It’s not an ‘exciting adventure’. It’s not an ‘eye-opening experience’.

Where’s the risk? Where’s the spontaneity? Where’s the genuine adventure?

It just feels like one big party and then afterward we all return to our boring ass dissatisfied lives. If all you wanted was to go clubbing, why even leave your home city? Just to pretend to ourselves that we’re ‘trying something new’ or ‘doing something different’?

Gross.

When do we open our eyes? Where’s the perspective shift? When do we challenge ourselves?

Fine to Dine, but Not Fine to Whine

Go. Stay at the resort. Enjoy the escape. But don’t expect anything else. Call it what it is – an escape. It’s not even a vacation. It’s just an escape.

Accept the realization that you’re going to return home the exact same way you left it – Dissatisfied and looking for something more… unless you challenge yourself.

I know way too many people that trick themselves into believing the daily grind is worth it because they get to ‘vacation to a resort’. And then we go right back to the daily grind, still living an unfulfilled life. It’s like a dog chasing its tail.

A goodie from On the Road by Jack Kerouac:

“They spent all week saving pennies and went out Saturdays to spend fifty bucks in three hours”. RIP

p39 On the Road by Jack Kerouac

As a general rule of thumb that I’ve found to be true – Unless you push yourself to try something new, nothing is going to change.

If you’re genuinely dissatisfied with your work or day-to-day you need a fundamental shift in mindset, not a temporary break from your current one.

Speaking From Personal Experience

It was Corona-cation. Well, before everyone knew it would be Corona-cation. Spring Break 2020. My buddy planned to ball out in Costa Rica for the week and asked if I wanted to tag along. Off Friday, we’ve got Saturday & Sunday, then a full week, plus the next Saturday & Sunday. 9 days. It was looking good.

Coconut trees and monkeys throwing feces? Hell yeah I wanted in. Plus learning to Salsa dance with some cute Costa Rican girls? Don’t mind if we do.

It was me, my buddy J, a teammate we’ll call Connor, and 2 wildcards. My buddy Connor had 2 female friends that had also been wanting to go to Costa Rica. The more the merrier, right? Why not? 5 of us, let’s do it.

Then the Logistics

I’m the type of guy who eats uncooked pasta and sleeps in someone’s bathtub so that I have enough money to bungee jump out of a hot air balloon. J agreed.

Connor was on the fence.

The two girls?
Not about it.

We had all hopped on a phone call together and I knew from the get-go it was going to be a tough sell. Connor was trying to mediate between myself and the 2 girls and let me just say, that boy was stretched thin. The first thing out of the 2 girls’ mouths?

“We were thinking about going to a beach resort”

Oh no. No no no no. That is not what I was trying to do in Costa Rica. A resort?? Talk about the economics for one. Secondly, the people. Thirdly, the culture. Do I need to continue? Why the hell are you buying an $800 round-trip flight for a resort?? Just go to one in the US for chrissake!

For me, a hotel was out of the question. An Air BnB? A stretch, but maybe. A resort though?? You’re out your damn mind.

I had been thinking of collective camping and maybe some hostels sprinkled in here or there.

There seemed to be a bit of a… how should we call it… disconnect between the travel styles.

J, being the more affable individual, went to great lengths to bridge the gap between parties. He understood where the 2 girls were coming from and tried to explain them my stubborn ass.

The girls had mentioned the safety component they were concerned about and fair enough. Foreign country. Minimal English. Spooky. Totally understandable, that’s a valid concern.

Certainly, safety should 100% be a priority.

But you are taking an inherent risk any time you step outside of your home. People are perpetually looking to take advantage of you. Scammers. Hackers. Door-to-doorers. Insurance companies. Jobs. Positions. Sales. Advertisements.

To different degrees, they’re all looking to take advantage of the human mind, and target its trigger points.

Resorts?

The exact same thing.

Spread the word that travel and hostels are dangerous so we still have a massive market for all-expenses paid resorts. Great marketing plan if you ask me.

Every single day you take a risk just going about your day. You could get mugged. You could get in a car crash (very likely btw). You could fall and break your arm. The possibilities are endless.

There are literal companies that exist solely by profiting off our fear… ever heard of the car market? And don’t even get me started on the beauty industry.

Fear is healthy. It’s what keeps us alive.

But think about where the fear came from – Is it a legitimate danger or merely abstract fear that have been passed down to you from parents, friends, and the internet with no real basis?

I’ve traveled to over 10 foreign countries and if there’s one thing I’ve learned it’d be this:

99% of people out there in the world are just trying to take care of themselves and their family. Most people are genuine and kind and live much more similar to you or me than most would expect.

I’m not saying to take unnecessary risks, but ill preparation and fear are no excuses to avoid life-changing opportunities.

That’s all fears are – An excuse.

How can you travel to a country as culturally rich and beautiful as Costa Rich and stay in a resort full of a bunch of other Americans?

You can do better than that.

You owe it to yourself to do better than that.

There’s a brilliant quote by George Addair that encapsulates all of this better than I ever could:

“Everything you’ve ever wanted is sitting on the other side of fear.“

Take a moment for the to sink in.

“Everything you’ve ever wanted is sitting on the other side of fear.”

Think about the most powerful, most fulfilling moments in your whole life. A wedding. A kid. An adventure. A risk. I’d be willing to bet there was an element of fear.

The first time I was going to a foreign country I felt the same thing. Fear. It’s ubiquitous.

It was scary traveling alone. It was scary living out of a backpack. It was scary stepping into the unknown.

But that’s the whole point – It’s rarely as scary as you make it out to be, whatever it is.

The anticipation is damn near always worse than the execution.

I’ve officially permeated the barrier of fear of travel and am here to say that backpacking and foreign travel is way less scary than you’d expect.

You meet tremendous people on the road. You realize there are tons of people out there just like you. The world isn’t actually out to get you and 99% of people are going about their daily lives. They have their own lives to live. Contrary to popular belief, most people’s primary goal isn’t to steal you. Most people are actually willing to help you.

Do you like seeing people suffer?

Guess what, they don’t either! I’ve asked for help several times on the road and not one has been turned down once.

“Stranger Danger”

It’s an iconic phrase in our language. I can tell you though, some of the best experiences I’ve had in my entire life came because of strangers – The largest dance festival in all of Iceland at 2 AM, sitting on sand dunes talking about psychedelics at midnight, jumping in a mountain lakes in Peru. These all came from entertaining the possibilities of strangers.

What’s the alternative, anyways? Never meet anyone new?? Keep our current relationships and never make new ones?

To turn down a new relationship just because they’re new is fear for the sake of fear. I’ve bought and sold 6 or 7 used cars in the past 4 years and I love it because of the cool and interesting people you meet. It exposes you to walks of life that you would otherwise never have met.

It is scary. But that’s the whole point. If this article does anything, I would hope it’s to prove that the world isn’t really as evil as we are led to believe.

It’s easier to stay home. It’s easier to believe people are out to get you. It’s easier to never leave the nest.

It's easier to be afraid

Don’t talk to strangers. It keeps us safe. It keeps our ego protected. We never have to feel unsafe or insecure. Our beliefs are never challenged. I’m not here to invalidate the fear of travel – Particularly solo travel. That level of fear keeps your head on a swivel. It keeps you safe.

But I am here to suggest that you can push through the fear.

Because life isn’t about staying safe. It’s about experiencing new things and growing. How are you going to do that if you never scare yourself?

Take a risk.

P.S. – For some tips, travel blogger Novo Monde breaks down some of the risks and mitigations:

https://www.novo-monde.com/en/prevent-risks-of-traveling/

For Some Social Proof

Call it survivor’s bias, but in my time visiting over 10 countries and counting, I’ve met a plethora of females who traveled solo.

I’m not saying it’s ‘safe’ per se. But traveling solo is one of those weird things that you don’t trust until you do. And then you realize that the world doesn’t actually revolve around us. For better or for worse, most of the time the world is not out to get us – We’re really not that important.

Don’t take it from me though. Take it from the handful of wonderful solo travelers (females!) I’ve met on the road.

Aliana (27 year old American met in Iceland) – Works a year as a veterinarian and then travels for a year. Never had any incidents while traveling.

Malaya (22 year old Swedish girl met in Peru) – Told us she had one instance where she didn’t feel comfortable. So she left and was totally fine. She said she listened to her gut, left the social occasion, and in her several months of solo travel only had good experiences.

Nikki (20 year old German girl met in Peru) – Backpacked for 7 months and was surprised when I asked her if she had any bad encounters with strangers.

Rai (22 year old girl from Hong Kong met in Spain) – Weeks on the road. Solo traveled through Spain. Had not had any sketchy encounters to date.

Badass and inspirational. All of these ladies that I met while traveling expanded my horizons. They opened my eyes to what’s possible. They’re living proof of what you can do when you go through the fear and take the leap.

Go explore.

*Note – Names have been changed to protect identities